Moving onward.

My last post was nearly a month ago - man, time really flies by. I came back to the island, excited to be back. But something inside of me had shifted without me realizing it. I have really loved being here, of course. Living here is so easy. You want a job? You can find it. An apartment? No problem. A fling? A flock of new, attractive backpackers arrives daily. You can find gringo-like things, like vegetarian restaurants, Brie cheese, sushi, and even televised sports in a place that strongly resembles your neighborhood sports bar. For all of these things, and more, I fell in love with living on this island. It's so completely detached from what feels like the rest of the world. The friends I have made while being here are the real substance of what drew me back. Its the Spanish speaking version of my group of friends back home, with a few extra twists.

I came back and was offered to become a manager of the bar and the hostel where I've been working the last 3 months. I would have the chance to make money, my apartment would be paid for. Life would be good. And talk about a resume builder! But after considering it for two days, I politely declined. I am not ready to actually settle in one place. Bocas served as a stop gap initially, and I decided it will only be that. I am so glad I stayed for as long as I have; and this place will always have a place in heart. But it's time to get moving! And that's what the shift was: i realized I'm Not content to stay here and sling drinks; that's not why I left home. I left because I wanted to know different cultures, to meet people with different walks of life, to learn Spanish, and ultimately to spend some time giving of my time, talents, and effort. For all of those reasons, and a few more, it's time to go.

As of tomorrow, the 11th of February, I will have been abroad for 6 months! Half of a year, and the majority of it has been in Panama. The thing is, I know I'll be back. I can come back and easily find something to occupy my time whenever I want. So, it's time to say goodbye, for now. In a week I'll be packing up again, and heading back into Costa Rica.

I'm looking forward to the challenge of working as a tour guide. I'm also looking forward to using sign language for the majority of the time I'm there! It's been too long since i've conversed in ASL. Even though it won't only be in ASL, it'll be great to flex those muscles in my brain once again and do some interpreting as well.

After that? My good friend Kelly flies in for her spring break. It'll be the first time I have had someone come and visit, and I can't wait. Once she leaves, my brother flies in! I'm stoked to get to see him, and for us to do some traveling together. We have plans to get a tattoo while in Colombia as well- more to come on that after the fact. :)

So things are looking good! I've saved a couple of bucks here, which is good. Not very much, but it's better than spending the savings I have left just killing time.

Once I got back here, I also realized that I wanted to get an apartment. I looked for once, very casually, for a day. Moved in the same day I found one! It's pretty decent- it's safe, has a kitchen, little living room, a bedroom and a bathroom. And the best part? It's all MINE. I pee with the bathroom door open. I get dressed in my own room. After 5 months of dorms, I figured I deserved my own space for one month. And it's been incredible! I have been spending a lot of time here. I read a whole book, an am halfway through another (it should be noted that in the last 5 months, I have successfully read only one book.) I sleep more. I can take naps. I can be messy and it doesn't matter. Oh man, it's been so nice!! And I can buy a bunch of groceries and I don't have to label them or consume them all within the next two days. I may miss being on my own the most. Who knows, maybe I'll fall more in love with Colombia than I did with Panamá, which sounds very feasible. I can't wait to hit the road again!